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Daily Life with an Octoling (Splatoon Fanfic)

Discussion in 'Original Content' started by MacSmitty, Jan 21, 2017.

  1. MacSmitty

    MacSmitty Inkling Cadet

    Aug 12, 2014
    Likes Received:
    Hey, I'm finally able to post this fanfic after sleeping on it for several months. Anyhoo, here it is.
    Early morning in Inkopolis, several Inklings are lining up at the train station in order to get to their destinations. One particular Inkling, being a white-skinned Soda colored Inkling wearing a Hero Headset Replica, a Zink Layered LS, and Pro Trail Boots along with carrying a N-Zap ‘89 was waiting for the train, having a distant look on his face.

    As the train arrived, the Soda-colored Inkling, named Jesse Rhode, got on and found a nearby seat to sit. The boy still had a distant look on his face as he was remembering the discussion he and his parents had before he headed out to do some battles.

    Flashback: Several minutes ago

    “So you guy’s finally got through all the paperwork?” Jesse asked his parents, lowing the tea cup he had been sipping on.

    “Yes!” Responded Jesse’s mother enthusiastically, who is a orange colored Inkling currently washing the dishes that he and his dad had put into the sink. “Now we’re ready to welcome a new member into the Rhode family~.”

    “It’ll be sometime before we greet our new family member,” states Jesse’s father a Soda colored Inkling wearing a business suit. “How about you go play some Turf Wars with your friends until later in the day?”

    “Huh? W-Wait!” The younger Inkling protests as his parents gently push him out of the house they lived in. “You haven’t even told me much about my new sibling!”

    “It’s a surprise.” Replied the parents in unison. “Get ready to meet your new sibling later tonight okay?” The Inkling parents said waving at the boy.

    End of FlashBack.

    As Jesse sat on the Train’s seats, he couldn’t help but wonder whether his new sibling would be a boy or a girl due to his parents wanting to surprise him. But he couldn’t help but give a melancholy sigh at the reason why his parents decided to adopt another kid in the first place.

    “Urgh. No need to think about that.” He thought while slightly shaking his head. “Whoever my new sibling is, I really hope they’re nice and not so bratty.” And with that, he began to imagine what his adopted sibling would be like.

    Jesse’s Delusion

    Jesse felt both of his arms being grabbed by two pairs of smaller arms on each side, and looking down he noticed that the source of the arms was two cute Inkling children, a boy and a girl.

    “Let’s play together, big brother Jesse!” The two Inklings said, giving the aforementioned boy a sparkly, puppy dog eyed look.

    Lost in his delusion, the boy merely closed his eyes, giving out a small chuckle. “Man... that would be nice...”

    The train then abruptly came to a stop, knocking Jesse out of his delusion and sending him in a fellow passenger's elbow. Immediately jerking his head away from the passenger, he turned to the person and began to a apologize.

    “Sorry about that! I wasn’t really prepared for the train to stop all of a sudden...” He trailed off when he noticed who he was talking to.

    He had landed in the head of a female Octoling wearing a Squid Girl Tunic along with the Squid Girl shoes. The Octoling girl was blankly staring at Jesse, not showing any signs of annoyance or embarrassment, which made the Inkling boy made him nervous about offending the girl. However, before he could apologize, His saving grace came when a companion of the Octoling, a yellow Inkling girl tapped the Octoling on the shoulder.

    “C’mon Mei! This is our stop!” She exclaimed as the train doors began to open along with an a voice announcing the name of the stop.

    “Oh. Coming.” The Octoling girl replied.

    Mei then turned her head back at Jesse and while getting up, nodded in understanding before leaving the train with her companion.

    Jesse, who had struggling to properly form sentences managed to regain his composure by responding with a quick, “Y-Yeah...”

    The soda-colored Inkling sighed as laid back into his seat. He had forgotten the fact that Octolings were now able to legally be in Inkopoplis without the police gunning them down.

    Apparently the government had decided that it was time to make amends with the Octolings, and with several negotiations, the government created the Octoling Exchange Act. The law allowed Octolings to stay with a host family in Inkopolis for as long as they lived, similar to a au-pair system. However if an Octoling committed some sort of crime then they would be deported right back to Octo Valley.

    The train then slowed down again, this time with an announcement blaring through the speakers that the train had reached Inkopolis Plaza.

    As the train doors opened, Jesse got up from his seat and began to follow the other passengers out of the train.

    I hope today’s roundabout won’t be as frustrating as yesterday’s. The soda colored Inkling thought with a scowl as he entered Inkopolis Plaza.
    This is my first fanfiction, so I'll take any feedback about it as long as it isn't presented in a rude way. It's also kinda a the reason I took so long to post it.
    Also, if you have an OC you want to be included in the story, PM a bio sheet and I'll include your character in the best I can.
    #1 MacSmitty, Jan 21, 2017
    Last edited: Jan 22, 2017
    Rustic likes this.
  2. Zerul

    Zerul Inkling Cadet

    Nov 9, 2015
    Likes Received:
    a good first chapter. your writing style is neat and clean. I evolved away from the setup your using but its a strong starting point for you. The story has some interesting things to work with. One big thing would be the whole plot of this story. Cant wait to find out how you handle an Octarain and Inkling sibling family. well i assume its an Octarain as you went the mile and came up with a reason for them to be in Inkopolis.
  3. Captain Woomy

    Captain Woomy Woomy Enthusiast

    Feb 8, 2016
    Likes Received:
    Sorry if you're looking for proper criticism. That's not really my thing. But I can tell you I thought it was good and want to read more.
  4. SquidRacer

    SquidRacer Inkling

    Aug 28, 2017
    Likes Received:
    This fanfic is amazing! you have quite a flair for writing
    MacSmitty likes this.
  5. MacSmitty

    MacSmitty Inkling Cadet

    Aug 12, 2014
    Likes Received:
    Thank You.
    Yin_ likes this.

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