Jiggly
Senior Squid
- Joined
- May 1, 2015
- Messages
- 76
- NNID
- Jiggly101
Hi, my name is Jiggly, and I'm a Re-roll-aholic.
Splatoon seemed like a colorful and family friendly shooter. I thought it would be a fun game to play on saturday nights on the couch, but little did I know, there was a dark deep secret. When ranked was released, I found myself drowning in money. What was I supposed to do with 500K coins? Well, one day I decided to go up and check out Callie and Marie, when I tripped and fell off of the high alley, and I fell all the way down. Little did I know, I fell into what would be my future hell. This nice dude by the name of Spyke beckoned me over. He seemed very charasmatic, and I don't know what came over me. He had the powers to modify my clothes. This was something only known by the ultimate dev gods. But yet, he had it all. I then found myself throwing coins at him, 30k at a time. The 500K I saved up over the last week was totally gone. I then found my self taking trips to Ranked, and coming back every time I scrape together a mere 30K. I found myself developing some form of disease that forces me to visit spyke whenever I make some sort of money. I was a rain cloud that made it rain all over spyke as he treated me to his powers. I was hoping to get that triple swim speed on my ninja squid anchor tee. And now, since the ninja squid nerf, I find myself even hungrier, with more need to get that triple swim up. The chances are very small. But, there's a chance. And when there's a chance, there is a spyke. Now Splatoon is nothing more than an obstacle to get spyke to envelop my clothing in magic. Its no longer a shooter, it's a lottery game. It's driven my pod of inklings apart. My family no longer talks to me. My wife Lindsey left me, and hooked up with an octarian. She took me to court, and the cuttlejudge gave her the kids. I lost Lindsey, Sarah and Michael, and my will to live. The battlefield is nothing but a hurdle to another re-roll. Everything is a blur, and my life is a blur. I am diseased. I am destroyed.
What are your guys' Re-roll addiction stories?
Splatoon seemed like a colorful and family friendly shooter. I thought it would be a fun game to play on saturday nights on the couch, but little did I know, there was a dark deep secret. When ranked was released, I found myself drowning in money. What was I supposed to do with 500K coins? Well, one day I decided to go up and check out Callie and Marie, when I tripped and fell off of the high alley, and I fell all the way down. Little did I know, I fell into what would be my future hell. This nice dude by the name of Spyke beckoned me over. He seemed very charasmatic, and I don't know what came over me. He had the powers to modify my clothes. This was something only known by the ultimate dev gods. But yet, he had it all. I then found myself throwing coins at him, 30k at a time. The 500K I saved up over the last week was totally gone. I then found my self taking trips to Ranked, and coming back every time I scrape together a mere 30K. I found myself developing some form of disease that forces me to visit spyke whenever I make some sort of money. I was a rain cloud that made it rain all over spyke as he treated me to his powers. I was hoping to get that triple swim speed on my ninja squid anchor tee. And now, since the ninja squid nerf, I find myself even hungrier, with more need to get that triple swim up. The chances are very small. But, there's a chance. And when there's a chance, there is a spyke. Now Splatoon is nothing more than an obstacle to get spyke to envelop my clothing in magic. Its no longer a shooter, it's a lottery game. It's driven my pod of inklings apart. My family no longer talks to me. My wife Lindsey left me, and hooked up with an octarian. She took me to court, and the cuttlejudge gave her the kids. I lost Lindsey, Sarah and Michael, and my will to live. The battlefield is nothing but a hurdle to another re-roll. Everything is a blur, and my life is a blur. I am diseased. I am destroyed.
What are your guys' Re-roll addiction stories?
