You have to marry your least favorite splatoon character. Do it, and all your wishes, hopes and dreams for side order and splatoon 4 come true.

[Waddleclaws]

Are you doing it?
(I apologize for what i wrote above.)

 

[SwiftyTaco]

If I don't have a least favorite character am I disqualified or do all the good things immediately happen?

 

[gay4bigman]

eeeeek, theres no way in the world im going to marry callie.. im not into women anyways! my hopes and dreams will never come true...

 

[Cephalobro]

So, you're saying that for there to be friendly tentacle Octarians walking around in the hub, I have to marry Pearl, Marie, or Shiver? Well, Marie is the least bad out of all of the three, so I'd pick her.

 

[Hokuto]

For Big Man to win the Final Fest and influence the future, for Marina's mystery role to be handled competently, and for my Agent 4 to return in some meaningful capacity, I would have to marry Sheldon. This would make things incredibly confusing in my offline life, so no, I don't think I will.

 

[Catloafman]

brellas become top tier and all have fun kits in S4 but I have to marry Marigold (staff)
Nah I will keep my mid tiers

 

[DChachouke]

I'm already married to my flingza, I fear. I'd rather not cheat on my wife

 

[DeirdreMega]

Bisk is really ugly so, no