🫵 you! assign splatoon weapons to non-splatoon characters!

[sevenleaf]

was doing some musings on the other website the other day and it made me want to bring this general topic to squidboards. i’m pretty sure this isn’t a repeat of an old thread but i can’t be bothered to think of every possible way someone could’ve phrased this concept in the past and search for them all…

but yeah like the title says, assign splatoon weapons to non-splatoon characters! OCs and characters from other properties are both acceptable. you can focus on just main weapons or assign whole kits, and if you do the latter you can stick to official kits (from any of the three games) or mix and match mains, subs, and specials to tailor kits to each character. finally, it’s up to you whether this means “imagine these characters literally as inkfish using these weapons in-universe” or “imagine these characters Playing Splatoon the Video Game and choosing weapons to main as players”

it’d be cool to hear your justifications for the weapon assignments you make, too, but that’s by no means a requirement. if you just want to drive by with “Blorbino Jones plays silver aero running respawn punisher” and nothing else you are fully allowed to do that.

the musings i mentioned that inspired this thread are still cooking so i’m gonna step back, let y’all start, and come back later with my own contributions

 

[Hokuto]

Finally, an excuse to flesh out the AU versions of my offline OCs!
In addition to being mediocre garage band Splatastic Clam Dragon, the bandmates also formed the worst Clam Blitz team in the Splatlands: Dunk Divers. A major component of their disadvantage is that none of them produce ink or use the respawn machine, because none of them are Inkfish, but also they suck in general.

• Chlorophyll Hassan, bassist and graphic designer, has me in a bit of a bind. I'm inclined to say she'd play a heavyweight weapon, either Tenta Brella or Explosher. Major spoilers for her story: she's a reformed mean girl, but I think a little bit of that cruel streak still lives in her. Point is, her idiot teammates (*they are actually all smart except in the context of ink sports) need someone to cover their butts and she's forced to do it. Chlorophyll is a leaf sheep, which is actually a sea slug.
• Whale Stevenson, singer/songwriter/frontman, is a Neo Sploosh one-trick. If asked REALLY nicely, he'd maybe consider Inkbrush. Either way, he's overconfident enough that he truly believes that getting close enough to the enemy is an automatic splat sentence, unless he has his Special ready, in which case he'll set a Beakon, return to base, and fire off before jumping right back in. Whale is a hāwaʻe urchin.
• Candy Lin, percussionist and sound guy, puts the other Killer Wails in Dunk Divers with Bamboozler I. (Yes, the Dunk Divers are a Car Seat Headrest joke.) He strikes me as a bit of a scrub who feels like he constantly has something to prove, so he hard committed to one of the hardest weapons in the game. If not to help fill the Killer Wail quota, he would have mained New Squiffer. Candy is a candy crab.
• Devil Miller, guitarist and manager, is just here because he wants his teammates to have fun. Honestly, what is a devil ray going to play with fins instead of fingers? Painbrush? A bucket? I don't know, he doesn't have a lot of options!

 

[QuagSass]

Kasane Teto my love, my dearly beloved. As much as I want to say that she would play Hydra because it's red and spins just like her drills, I know I'd only be lying to myself.

Teto's hair is like her most iconic feature and memes involving her hair are some of the most ancient and numerous! Of course her weapon has to reflect that. And while Hydra gets close, there's another that was practically made for her.

The Dualie Squelchers.

They're literal twindrills. And they're red! Also you can dodge roll with them! Which isn't quite the same as spinning, but it's close enough.
And as another, more tenuous, connection you could also say that Dualie Squelchers are a chimera like Teto. Since it's a Dualie version of the Dual Squelcher. So it's like a Shooter spliced with a Dualie.

So yeah, Teto would 100% main Squelchies.
Maybe she could still have Hydra as her secondary weapon tho...


Hatsune Miku mains the vanilla Splatana Wiper. This one I have no reasoning for, just ~vibes~

 

[Shinymew]

I think that Akita Neru (the yellow on who isn't in mesmeriser) would main a charger, because those are like the least active weapon in the meaning of they don't have to run around a lot, and I think that Neru isn't the most active person. Miku might also use a inkbrush for the same reason you think wiper, for the aesthetic.

 

[Bennet]

Samus Aran with a Blaster or S-Blast would be cool to see

 

[solz]

Yoshi mains jet cuz yes

 

[DzNutsKong]

i'm technically not assigning anything with post but here are some correct answers as proven by one of nintendo's official videos

 

[Masked_Katz]

I always wanted to try the Big Swig - especially the Big Swig Express, the yellow one - because of their colorful pastel colors that remind me a lot of something like Spongebob, I could easily see him main that

 

[Shinymew]

I always wanted to try the Big Swig - especially the Big Swig Express, the yellow one - because of their colorful pastel colors that remind me a lot of something like Spongebob, I could easily see him main that

 

[Bennet]

View attachment 14431

spongebob would be better of with an aerospray MG

 

[Shinymew]

spongebob would be better of with an aerospray MG

Not my best photoshop but...

 

[Bennet]

Not my best photoshop but...
View attachment 14438

(edit) Nvm, I can't due to my dad's crappy Dell Inspiron 15 laptop

 

[Shinymew]

Pls dont use it as ur pfp Its terrible, I will make u a better one if ur serious

 

[Bennet]

Pls dont use it as ur pfp Its terrible, I will make u a better one if ur serious

nah, it's ok, I wanted to see if I can do it on my dad's crappy laptop

 

[technobyte]

Sounds fun! I'll do a few characters from risk of rain 2

First some obvious ones

Mercenary uses a cool laser sword and is highly agile, so I'd say VStamper suits him perfectly. Zip kind of mimics his dashing attacks and stamper is, well, a sword.

Huntress is also very agile, but uses a bow instead. Stringer class is the way to go with vanilla reeflux being the best pick imo due to reef being a lightweight and mobile weapon. Plus tenta missiles are similar to her arrow rain special attack.

Railgunner, as her name suggests, uses a railgun, so I call E-liter 4k scope. Ink mine is similar to her compression mines, just without the strong knockback effect, and wavebreaker is similar to her ability to see enemy weak points through her scope.

As for some slightly less obvious ones

Poison doggo Acrid mostly leans toward melee, though he also has a leave-and-forget sort of play style with his epidemic special where he spreads a poison status effect over all of his enemies. I'm inclined to say Krak-On splat roller because of his aggressive melee attacks and tendency to leap in and out of combat, but Octobrush Nouveau also somewhat captures his play style well with inkstorm providing wide-spread DOT and the brush itself offering aggressive melee damage, not to mention beacons allowing the user to jump into or out of fights.

The legendary captain, one of my favorites, is especially weird. I've been trying to stick to official kits, but he's a bit of a special case. He has a chargeable shotgun for a hand, a tiny robot that passively targets and blocks projectiles, access to orbital strikes, big and small, and, notably, access to supply beacons that support himself and allies. He also has a bouncing taser as his secondary attack, though it's not the strongest. All around a very supportive survivor! Three specials especially suit him, notably triple inkstrike, the original inkstrike, and tacticooler to represent his orbital strikes and supply beacons. Big bubbler could also fit since it's a beacon and it can block projectiles, but the main problem comes from how to represent his chargeable shotgun. I might knock two birds with one stone and pick splat brella as his main since it is a shotgun weapon that can block projectiles. Sub weapon could be either angle shooter to represent his taser or squid beacon to represent his supply beacons.

Anyway I can only attach 5 images at a time, but I'll still mention a couple of others

Commando is a basic survivor with two pistols. They also have a useful slide utility for dodging attacks or getting around, so just about any dualie weapon would suit them. I'd probably pick vanilla dualie squelchers since splat bomb also covers for their alternate special, a frag grenade. Plus wave breaker looks like their helmet but that's about it lol.

Engineer can place up to two turrets anywhere on the map that inherit most of his items. His primary lets him launch a bunch of grenades out, and his utility lets him either deploy a bubble shield to block attacks or, if you have his alternate utility, send heat-seeking missiles toward enemies. Lastly, he can place mines with his secondary. Already, big bubbler, tents missiles, crab tank, and even super chumps are four great specials to represent most of his kit. There's also ink mine for representing his secondary. Main weapon is a harder pick, but I say he'd be fine with hydra splatling since he normally has more of an anchored playstyle. So hydra + mine + big bubbler?

I'll end this off on my top favorite, false son. He is an absolute unit that swings a large club around, fires shards that increase the damage enemies take, can pretty much teleport around short distances, and can also fire powerful laser beams (or bursts as his alternate special.) Decavitator already feels like a fitting choice to represent his club, and angle shooter and killer wail would also reflect his laser attacks pretty well. I'll throw a curve ball, though, and say that sting ray would likely be a fitting special since its an almost perfect representation of his laser of the father special.

...
So uh, I was planning on stopping at railgunner but I got a little bit carried away. There's still plenty more survivors I could do, but I feel like I've been here long enough lol. Anyway, thanks for reading!

P.S. I recommend checking out risk of rain 2 if you're into roguelikes, it's awesome!

 

[AdphæeXD]

ill join in on the vocaloid (lag)train. since the triple baka group is taken, ill start with...

defoko! since their all computer generated sounds, they give me N-Zap vibes. are those correlated things—idk!

and since i made a lagtrain reference, yuki would be vDapples. Dapples give that kid vibe to me, and the kit is a perfect INABAKUMORI reference: beacons for "radar" and cooler for "Cooler Girl". unfortunately, we do miss the "lost umbrella" and "loop spinner" references ;-;

[edit: vDapples are also red like Yuki!]

 

[Bennet]

Sounds fun! I'll do a few characters from risk of rain 2

First some obvious ones
View attachment 14443
Mercenary uses a cool laser sword and is highly agile, so I'd say VStamper suits him perfectly. Zip kind of mimics his dashing attacks and stamper is, well, a sword.

View attachment 14444
Huntress is also very agile, but uses a bow instead. Stringer class is the way to go with vanilla reeflux being the best pick imo due to reef being a lightweight and mobile weapon. Plus tenta missiles are similar to her arrow rain special attack.

View attachment 14445
Railgunner, as her name suggests, uses a railgun, so I call E-liter 4k scope. Ink mine is similar to her compression mines, just without the strong knockback effect, and wavebreaker is similar to her ability to see enemy weak points through her scope.

As for some slightly less obvious ones

View attachment 14446

Poison doggo Acrid mostly leans toward melee, though he also has a leave-and-forget sort of play style with his epidemic special where he spreads a poison status effect over all of his enemies. I'm inclined to say Krak-On splat roller because of his aggressive melee attacks and tendency to leap in and out of combat, but Octobrush Nouveau also somewhat captures his play style well with inkstorm providing wide-spread DOT and the brush itself offering aggressive melee damage, not to mention beacons allowing the user to jump into or out of fights.

View attachment 14447
The legendary captain, one of my favorites, is especially weird. I've been trying to stick to official kits, but he's a bit of a special case. He has a chargeable shotgun for a hand, a tiny robot that passively targets and blocks projectiles, access to orbital strikes, big and small, and, notably, access to supply beacons that support himself and allies. He also has a bouncing taser as his secondary attack, though it's not the strongest. All around a very supportive survivor! Three specials especially suit him, notably triple inkstrike, the original inkstrike, and tacticooler to represent his orbital strikes and supply beacons. Big bubbler could also fit since it's a beacon and it can block projectiles, but the main problem comes from how to represent his chargeable shotgun. I might knock two birds with one stone and pick splat brella as his main since it is a shotgun weapon that can block projectiles. Sub weapon could be either angle shooter to represent his taser or squid beacon to represent his supply beacons.

Anyway I can only attach 5 images at a time, but I'll still mention a couple of others

Commando is a basic survivor with two pistols. They also have a useful slide utility for dodging attacks or getting around, so just about any dualie weapon would suit them. I'd probably pick vanilla dualie squelchers since splat bomb also covers for their alternate special, a frag grenade. Plus wave breaker looks like their helmet but that's about it lol.

Engineer can place up to two turrets anywhere on the map that inherit most of his items. His primary lets him launch a bunch of grenades out, and his utility lets him either deploy a bubble shield to block attacks or, if you have his alternate utility, send heat-seeking missiles toward enemies. Lastly, he can place mines with his secondary. Already, big bubbler, tents missiles, crab tank, and even super chumps are four great specials to represent most of his kit. There's also ink mine for representing his secondary. Main weapon is a harder pick, but I say he'd be fine with hydra splatling since he normally has more of an anchored playstyle. So hydra + mine + big bubbler?

I'll end this off on my top favorite, false son. He is an absolute unit that swings a large club around, fires shards that increase the damage enemies take, can pretty much teleport around short distances, and can also fire powerful laser beams (or bursts as his alternate special.) Decavitator already feels like a fitting choice to represent his club, and angle shooter and killer wail would also reflect his laser attacks pretty well. I'll throw a curve ball, though, and say that sting ray would likely be a fitting special since its an almost perfect representation of his laser of the father special.

...
So uh, I was planning on stopping at railgunner but I got a little bit carried away. There's still plenty more survivors I could do, but I feel like I've been here long enough lol. Anyway, thanks for reading!

P.S. I recommend checking out risk of rain 2 if you're into roguelikes, it's awesome!

yo, you play ROR2? sweet!

 

[Mx_Diva]

Travis Touchdown would wield the Splatana Stamper.

 

[Mx_Diva]

Simpsons' Sea Captain would get the Splatterscope weapons because he always has a scope. This game is also why he's so woke too.

 

[How•SweeT!]

Mario would use a roller on my opinion. That seems like his type. Imagine home coming out the ground to crush you