I had a terrible one yesterday (yeah, forum newbie here with only one thread of activity!). I'm not the best player by far, probably worse than 60% of the people on this board at least), but not a bad one either. I've had my fair share of awful random teams with the usual problems to gripe about, though I can be pretty tolerant of it because I've let my team down enough times to understand.
There's the common failures where we lose badly, I know I didn't do the best I've done and feel it's my fault....then on the end page I find that I was the team leader with top coverage and the only positive k/d on the team (and/or the only non-zero kill count.) I feel like yelling at the screen: How could you all possibly fail worse than me, I sucked!? o_O
And the common failure where I seem to be holding down an entire base invasion all by myself, usually with the worst weapon to do so, 1v3 and I look around and my team is nowhere to be found. For the entire match.
There's the common failures where the team keeps racing to battle and seems to have forgotten that there's actually a base and it should be inked too.
My own stupid worst failure is often forgetting, completely, repeatedly that I have a special charged. I'll walk right into battle, get splatted and realize I had a charged kraken/bubbler ready to go. Most other failures (other than falling into the water in Mahi. All too often.) are just playing badly that day, but the special thing is my own big stupid.
But I've had three specific teams in random TW that stand out to me as overwhelmingly bad. (or weird.) The worst of which was yesterday.
The. Worst. Splatoon. Team. Ever. I was running splat charger as an overgrown squiffer, random TW, I'm new to chargers, been playing them since Thursday, so I'm largely not great at them, but can hold my own *IF* my team supports me even loosely. I can't carry the whole team by myself with a charger right now. Not usually... So we're in the warehouse, game starts normally, meet the enemy at center, the enemy makes a press forward paints over much of the map to our base but doesn't get to spawn camp. We (by we, I mean I) push them back at about 1:30 into the match. I cover the side areas. I take over the left side hallway ramp that goes to their base, clear out the main area in front of their base. I send bomb rushes in and paint over their section of the base. I continue covering from alternate locations, inside the hall ramp, then back down in front of the ramp covering their main base area. Their team tries to make a few breaks for it, I keep them back. I'm not a fan of spawn camping, but it was 1v4 up there, so I'm not sure that counts. So for a full third or more of the match I have the enemy completely contained all by myself, locked into their base (clearly not a great enemy team....even a modestly decent team could have taking me out in seconds, I'm sure, I'm not one of those ace snipers, not by a long shot. In fact I'd say it was a downright bad enemy team.) I wasn't watching the map since I was keeping the enemy locked up and bought my team a third of a match to paint every last corner of one of the smallest maps in the game. The round ends, Judd pops out of nowhere, I look at the map. WHAAAAT?? How is it possible? Most of the map was still the enemy color! We lost. Not just slightly. A massive loss. 21 or so % map coverage loss. How does a team possibly lose when they have the entire map to themselves for the last third of the match?? I had a 14/0 k/d and 1800pts. And we lost by about 80%. I figure maybe it was 2v4 with some DC's. Nope, everyone had their points.... 3 people were unable to paint the warehouse in an entire minute with no opposition, and no attempt to approach the enemy. No battling, no lone wolfing. I can only assume the 3 of them were having a grand old squid party back there while I was holding the enemy at bay alone.
Second worst was the team in art museum that would go out to the rotating platforms and have a squid party before I knew squid party was a thing. I had no idea what was going on, thought it was a glitch. Enemy kept pasting us and they're just flopping around on the platforms, but there was one that wasn't partying but wasn't doing anything.
The third was weird more than bad. That same guy followed after the partiers left. I couldn't figure him out. I was playing with chargers at the time (but was REALLY bad with them at the time, just testing them out), he had a squiffer. He kept hovering around me, spamming c'mon, but then wouldn't really go anywhere. I thought maybe he was trying to show me the ropes of chargers or something, saving kills for me, but I couldn't tell exactly what was going on. It was only TW so I followed along, but to this day have no idea what was really going on. All I could think of is that he saw I was a really awful charger noob and was trying to help. When he was on the enemy team he'd be aiming at me, but not shooting, but then sometimes would shoot, but I felt bad shooting him if he was trying to help so I generally avoided it, usually getting sniped myself. Maybe I was just a practice dummy? :) That one was weird, but not bad. Unless I was a practice dummy the guy seemed nice enough, I just wish I knew what he was actually trying to do. It went on for an hour or so.
