OnePotWonder

I'm beginning to get utterly sick of this game.
Every match; shooters, blasters, dualies. Would it kill Nintendo to make weapons that are actually fun to fight good, in place of this trash?
Why can't we have Brellas be top tier? Why not Splatlings? It's starting to wear on me.

Raise your hand if you hate Rank-Up Battles.

Out of boredom and burnout, I decided to pick up Big Swig Express again. It's very easy to forget how powerful the main weapon is. I think it's safe to say that the weapon is in the category of "could be good with a real kit", though a damage scaling buff to its horizontal flicks would go a long way.

My dream kit for Big Swig would probably be Ink Mine + Crab Tank.

On an unrelated note, I've finally found a weapon to main; Splatana Stamper Nouveau. It's a near-perfect blend of the criteria I look for in a weapon; good fighting range, strong in melee, has Crab Tank. It leaves a little to be desired in the paint and sub weapon departments, but I have Mint Decav and Heavy Edit Nouveau to fill in those gaps.

Took long enough.

The shooter post is made. Feels indescribably good to finally get that off of my hyperfixation to-do list.

I am not happy. NOT. HAPPY.
I HOPE YOU'RE PROUD OF YOURSELVES TEAM PAST.
We made so much progress in this series, and rather that enjoy what we have or look forward to what's coming, you'd rather soulfully reflect on how good Sting Ray and Kraken were. You supported the only time when the game was objectively worse, and won. Good going. The past is a place for mistakes and failures. Why care about it at all?!

A small complication has arisen with regards to the shooter post.
After Squeezer got nerfed, I tried it out again. I ended up liking it post-nerfs. That on its own isn't a problem; the semi-autos were already mostly exempt from the issues I have with the rest of the class. Except then I felt like playing Kraken Royale, and tried out .96 again due to its similar playstyle. It wasn't bad. This is a problem.

Regrettably, I’ve decided to drop Recycled Brella. As much as I love the main even with its flaws, the kits are both so undeniably awful that it’s just not worth my time, especially when Sorella Brella exists.

The anti-shooter thread will be postponed until I recover from my current tilt.
(I played two hours straight of the Gear-Ability Shuffle challenge and I currently hate everything.)

This may take upwards of a week.

Replay code: RDRX-ARN8-TJ1Y-AA6T

Look at the N-ZAP in this game and tell me this **** is fair.
That anti-shooter thread may be coming a wee bit early.

Had a really strange dream last night where I won a Crab Tank duel against an Octobrush on a stage that seemed vaguely like Manta Maria.
I haven’t even been playing that much… must be due to my current weapon crisis.

Could you please credit me for your pfp?

I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY ABOUT THAT WAVE 5 YOU MONSTER

Sincerely, the Hydra player