Express your emotions 2: Emotion harder

[Slushious]

Spent some time yesterday muscling things around in the storage unit so we can put our (overpriced) couch in there since we're replacing it with a kotatsu. Among some of the Things That Can Be Got Rid Of is, sadly, the Elder Futon. Except I can't find the bag of hardware needed to reassemble the thing. I know it's somewhere in the house, just not looking forward to digging into the closet where I think it is.

So now that I just finally got all the Xmas stuff out of the back of my car, there's this clanking load of futon frame parts that's taken its place.

 

[Dessgeega]

Apparently there are unpleasant folks out there who check this thread now and then to find a reason to harass people. You know who you are. This is supposed to be an open space where people can safely share their thoughts, but that seemingly isn't the case.

Hah... I brought back this thread and I'm not comfortable using it because of the people out there. Thought about asking the mods to just delete it, but someone's probably going to want it down the line. I'll just unwatch and never come back. Admittedly I'm saying this here partially to see if this provokes those people to cause more trouble. Go on, prove me right about being unable to comfortably use this! I'm done.

 

[Slushious]

Found the hardware bag. It's been sitting on top of the dryer in plain sight for the past year.

We spent six hours in the city yesterday to find out it'll be an all-day job (on some other day both the roomie and I have off, of course) for the mechanics to access my serpentine belts in order to change them. The problem apparently is that the head of the bolt that holds the alternator belt on has been stripped somehow, so they'll have to take the whole thing apart to get to it, if anyone's curious =p
Mechanic assured me (with a very unconvincing smile) the car will get me down to Atl and back just fine.

Power's been off and on thanks to the wind since yesterday. NBD really, just irritating.

Finally 1000%ed singleplayer mode.
Niece #2 is getting married.
Splat manga vol. 2 comes to Barnes & Noble on the 13th, so there's that to look forward to.

 

[Zak98]

Generally being able to handle school and work now, about time.

 

[Zak98]

This kid I've had so many issues with came running so mad at me and banged me on the wall, and my head was bleeding yesterday. **** this person.

If you want my full story read this: https://prnt.sc/iofvd3

 

[Slushious]

I'M SO HYPED.

 

[Либра]

Hype, hype hype. So much hype I can't really put it into words. The direct last night was legit the best two or three hours I've spent in my last 8 weeks or so, and it has been quite a while since I was in voice chat with my friendos - and it turned out we're in for Splats 3.0 and the inkoming Octo expansion which, in addition to the (also smash related) hype and the group dynamic catapulted me back into splats again which I originally took an indefinite break from because of a couple things I felt needed sorting out before deciding to dive back in. Pre-ordered the octo expansion that night and went to sleep which proved infinitely harder this time around because the hype kinda kept me awake and ku-rei-jiiii.... ah well. So today rolled around and I got another blood work back from the doc and it I can rest assured that I'm perfectly fine, health-wise and I've finally recovered from some ....harder times. Inviting a friend for dinner and splats was a huge success and we enjoyed warming up in SR despite some rounds proving harder than we were used to, and some good old turf wreckage. E-Liter turns out to still work for me and I rolled some neat gear. All in all it was a wonderful day and a good way to dive back into splats and life in general. E-Liter is bae. I don't care what you think.

 

[the]

Ugh I’ve felt like such a failure at everything lately. I can’t make other people happy, I can’t please my superiors, I can’t even keep myself happy. And on top of that I had a nightmare last night about past drama coming back to haunt me, bc I rly needed that hanging over me

Everything just sucks right now, I thought things were looking up and like always I just get hit with wave after wave of soul crushing negativity

 

[Slushious]

The talking heads at work keep changing up how we do our paperwork, adding even more duties to what we already have, and enforcing the use of paperwork that - quite frankly - is absolutely meaningless.

Still no raises, negotiations for PTO/sick leave or vacations.

 

[Sgt. Puffling]

Well, I know I swore I'd completely cut myself off from this horrible godforsaken place known as Squidboards but I need to get this off my chest because I'm really only Discord friends with people who wake up at 11 AM now and I have to be stuck waking up really goddamn early every day.

Yesterday, I permanently got rid of one of my lifesaving coping mechanisms. I just completely cut myself off. I'm completely done with it.

Do I regret it? Yes and no. No, because when I think about it socially, it was sort of ruining me. My friends all hated it, and I'm pretty sure if I hadn't stopped, then they'd all leave me in the dust for it. Well, maybe more than pretty sure...

And yes, I do regret it because sometimes it meant life or death for me in especially hard times. With these instabilities, a sensory issue upon sensory issue, and tons of anxiety issues as well... Well, I'm not sure. I might have to go back to smoking or drinking to keep myself sane at this point. Because it hurts. It really does, and I can't help it because I'm limiting myself due to all these issues.

So, aside from me keeping one of the items a friend gave me because it is a relic to me... I'm done with this coping strategy! I'm leaving all boards dedicated to it and anyone who's only friends with me because of it can **** right off I guess! Because I'm done and not going back!

 

[ThatOneGuy]

I dun f***'d up, since I put the "Pro" in "Procrastinate".

Oh look, I'm doing it again. I hate myself sometimes.

 

[Slushious]

tfw life is straight up just ganging up on you

 

[Elecmaw]

nah, forget what i wrote

 

[Zak98]

I don't have autism and/or down syndrome just becuase i act in a different way to all of you, obviously you'd have that if you told me i have autism and down syndrome.

 

[Zak98]

I really hate the fact how everyone pretty much knows I am the weakest in the form, and that's becuase they held my arms and realised my muslces barely weigh anything. They're lucky that I'm like this right now becuase they can get away with any **** to say; soon when they see my body transformation they'll realise they have made a huge mistake. You will all crumble to kness and become my *****

 

[Emperor]

I have been doing surprisingly well ever since I left a different fandom.

 

[IHaveAToaster]

Hey, I remember when this thread was closed. Nice to see it open, just in time too.

Regardless, I've got tense times ahead of me. The end of my time in education is almost over, and after that it's off to a job (I think). While I joke about it a lot personally, I don't think I've ever been so scared in my life - to be kicked out into the cold and be made to do something as big as find a job... but I'm trying to stay optimistic, it's very hard to especially with things like Lyn being deconfirmed for SSBU, but I'm trying - because in the end, isn't it the only thing we can really do?

I can't help but be reminded of one the last lines of one my favourite eras of one my favourite Sci-Fi shows:
"This song is ending, but the story never ends."

Spoiler: Disclaimer

Sorry if this too personal or heavy for the thread, but I really needed to get this off my chest to more than just my close friends and family. (Plus it'll be good for my personal archival purposes...)

 

[Windstar]

They said the same old platitudes that everyone has heard a million times. "It gets better" "take it day by day" "lots of people care about you.”

So now that they know an embarrassing and vulnerable fact about me, what have I gained? Do I feel better? Are they going to have any insight or advice that I haven't already learned? Ha, no. At best they have sympathy for me (which I don't want), and at worst they will be uncomfortable and not want to interact with me anymore (this happened with 3 different friends before I finally learned my lesson).

I mean, perhaps that helps for people with very mild or temporary depression. And that's fine and all, but it's pretty discouraging when the advice literally begins and ends with "talk to someone." If you say "yeah so I tried that..." they'll just throw their hands up and tell you to use drugs.

Or just say "hang in there!" Hang in there, huh? Just a few more decades and you'll die naturally. Hang in there, every day is a living hell with no respite from the emotional numbness/pain, but do it anyway. Depression causes you to be a worthless failure because you don't have the motivation to further your career or social life, but hang in there as a complete loser!

Then of course the natural progression beyond 'someone' is a 'therapist.' "Talk to a therapist and get help." Ok, let me just pull money out of my ***, and pay hundreds of dollars for someone who probably won't be able to do **** for me anyway...

 

[J'Wiz]

There's volunteer therapists out there. The only issue is finding them. I would ask at a Department of Human Services or Health Department. I am not sure how much consulting helps, and they might just rely on medicating the person. Even if it's all they do, it's an attempt at making things better.

 

[Либра]

Emotional rollercoaster doesn't even begin to describe what I'm going through currently, along with varying degrees of energy levels because my sleep schedule decided to do the "all over the place" dance for me again. Here's to life, folks.