Splatoon 3 Salt Mines

[Arigato!]

I have major beef with this game at times. What about you?

 

[rosylina]

wins three games in a series "I love this game!" loses the following three games "This is actually the worst game ever and I hate everything."

I think everything I could complain about in Splatoon 3 is either something that's been beaten to death (maps like Eeltail are an affront to god) or something that's like, it matters to me but it doesn't hamper my enjoyment of the game to a severe degree. Stuff like wishing there were more earring and crop top options, being able to color lock gear that changes with ink color so that I can make outfits I want to and not have them be mismatched as soon as I enter a game, wishing we got more Octoling hairstyles, etc.

The only things that are like noteworthy to me are Tableturf not having actual matchmaking in the game. The amount of players actively playing this gamemode might be teeny tiny compared to the rest of the playerbase, but like... not being able to just que up and play against someone kind of makes that a self-fulfilling prophecy, doesn't it? It's less accessible to play tableturf against someone as opposed to just playing regular old turf war or ranked, so not as many people are going to bother with it.

I also hate scales, and my feelings haven't changed there since I made that post. It's genuiely like it was designed for a more predatory game that makes you give up and just purchase currency with real money cause it takes too got dang long.

 

[Cephalobro]

I also hate how the scales are rewarded to the player. Like is that hard to give us more than 1 Golden Scale from fighting a King Salmonid? Heck, why not guarantee a Golden Scale when the King Salmonid is defeated? And what's with three banners that cost 333 Golden Scales?

Oh and my gripes with Salmon Run doesn't end there, what's with people ignoring Slammin' Lids? Not only are they useful against other Boss Salmonids, but they can cause an indirect wipeout to players due to how they keep spawning common Salmonids. So yes, two completely different reasons not to ignore the Slammin' Lids.

In terms of actual gear, it's a shame the single-player-related gear from Splatoon 2 has not made a comeback in 3. They could've easily been made obtainable in Side Order.

 

[OnePotWonder]

Splatoon 3 is a good game littered with god awful design.

The lowest offence on the scale is the amount of grinding required to obtain badges. This is fair because they're badges, the whole point of having them is to flex your achievements. But, really? 9 999 999 Grizzco points for the golden point badge?

Next is matchmaking. It works most of the time, but then you get a game with two Tri-Stringers and an E-liter, and the other team has three shooters and a Tri-Slosher. By the way, you're playing a splatling.

Speaking of shooters, the game completely fails to make harder weapons stronger than easier ones. No matter what, there will always be a shooter in top tier. Nintendo sees to it intentionally. I don't get it, why should the basic vanilla Splattershot be at the same level as Snipewriter and Splatana Stamper? They should nerf good shooters into high or mid tier and let dualies or brellas take their place.
At the very least, have the top tier shooters be the semi-automatics. Instead of them being, you know, bottom tier.

Tableturf Battle cannot be played online. The mode is therefore completely dead.

For whatever reason, Flyfish are still in the game.

Nintendo refuses to balance sub weapons despite the fact that half of them are utterly outclassed. They keep putting Squid Beakons on short-range weapons that cannot do anything without bombs. Meanwhile Heavy Edit, a perfect Beakon option, gets Splat Bomb.

Side Order takes about five hours to 100% complete and the only real difficulty comes from playing with no hacks enabled, which is just generally not fun.

It takes a century to gather enough king scales for so much as one of the three golden Grizzco banners. Also, the quality of the scales is completely independent from whether or not you actually defeat the king salmonid.

.52 Gal is good despite having two specials that do barely anything for it. .52 Gal is the most complained about weapon in the game. Sloshing Machine was given a 5 frame slosh rate nerf when it was good. Why has .52 Gal received zero nerfs?

The maps go out of their way to add the most garbage, useless routes into each team's base just so enemies can push in farther and spawn camp more easily. The grates on Scorch Gorge. The uninkable floor on Eeltail. That one grate on Mincemeat. That one block on Barnacle and Dime. These routes would be better if they didn't exist, so why do they?

And the thing I hate most about the game, touching enemy ink for a single frame will cause you to get trapped unless you run any Ink Resistance Up. Enemy ink is the bane of my existence. Forget fixing Ink Resistance Up by having one sub be default, one main should be default. Enemy ink should not affect the player unless they sit in it for at least half a second, and all weapons should ink their users' feet every single shot.

The premise of Splatoon 3 and the general gameplay is something that's irreplicably good. I just wish they could fix a few things about the game.

 

[Arigato!]

I

wins three games in a series "I love this game!" loses the following three games "This is actually the worst game ever and I hate everything."

I think everything I could complain about in Splatoon 3 is either something that's been beaten to death (maps like Eeltail are an affront to god) or something that's like, it matters to me but it doesn't hamper my enjoyment of the game to a severe degree. Stuff like wishing there were more earring and crop top options, being able to color lock gear that changes with ink color so that I can make outfits I want to and not have them be mismatched as soon as I enter a game, wishing we got more Octoling hairstyles, etc.

The only things that are like noteworthy to me are Tableturf not having actual matchmaking in the game. The amount of players actively playing this gamemode might be teeny tiny compared to the rest of the playerbase, but like... not being able to just que up and play against someone kind of makes that a self-fulfilling prophecy, doesn't it? It's less accessible to play tableturf against someone as opposed to just playing regular old turf war or ranked, so not as many people are going to bother with it.

I also hate scales, and my feelings haven't changed there since I made that post. It's genuiely like it was designed for a more predatory game that makes you give up and just purchase currency with real money cause it takes too got dang long.

I hate it when a blaster jump directs me multiple times without intensify action.

 

[Tinybitt]

Ohhhh don't even get me started.

I guess there are issues with the meta, but that will be a constant. People didn’t like crab meta, nor the inkjet meta nor the Tacticooler meta (my least favourite is the tacticooler since it completely excuses bad plays and also brings a weapon that was universally hated for its design into a must have on a team since it has this one special)


I feel like this game doesn’t adequately reward players who put in the effort to learn more difficult weapons. It’s something OnePotWonder was getting at and while I do think that splattershot is a “Easy to learn, hard to master” thing, I don’t understand why only one splatling and one charger are viable (and even then, the charger is only viable because of the special).

BUT ABSOLUTELY MOST OF ALL, the thing that I have the most beef with is the matchmaking.

In what universe will a Liter, Blob, hydra and neo splash will win a game of splat zones against 3 shooters and a splatling?
Also apparently, the game doesn’t take your rank into full account, so a B player can play with S rank and vice versa. I honestly wish that splat used an ELO system or something similar to X-rank. (More like something along the lines of FACEIT for Counter strike)

Also, regarding SR, the randomness should be quelled at least a little bit. 11 Stingers for 2 waves?? One of which is low tide?

 

[Cephalobro]

Also, regarding SR, the randomness should be quelled at least a little bit. 11 Stingers for 2 waves?? One of which is low tide? View attachment 11975

100% agreed, I miss the Splatoon 2 system of boss spawns where only three of a type of boss could be present on the field, now it seems like there's no limit to certain boss spawns and it really sours my opinion of the mode. I was so excited that they introduced the egg throw mechanic to fix the glaring issue I had with SR before. Also, I understand the change into not allowing players to easily accumulate cash, but was that change really necessary when so many things in the game was made to be crazy expensive, even the attempt at the Shell-Out Machine?

 

[OnePotWonder]

my least favourite is the tacticooler since it completely excuses bad plays and also brings a weapon that was universally hated for its design into a must have on a team since it has this one special

Which weapon is that again? Snipewriter? I think the main is fine but the kit is definitely overpowered. I don’t think it would be nearly as hated if it had gotten, say, a Booyah Bomb.

I feel like this game doesn’t adequately reward players who put in the effort to learn more difficult weapons. It’s something OnePotWonder was getting at and while I do think that splattershot is a “Easy to learn, hard to master” thing, I don’t understand why only one splatling and one charger are viable (and even then, the charger is only viable because of the special).

I can respect top level players for playing their Shots and ZAPs super well, but as an enjoyer of weapons like Splat Brella, Goo Tuber, H-3 Nozzlenose; it feels insulting to have the shooter you unlock at level 2 beat out those weapons in solo queue. And don’t even get me started of Recycled Brella.

Also, regarding SR, the randomness should be quelled at least a little bit. 11 Stingers for 2 waves?? One of which is low tide?

Damn. I wish I could have been there, sounds like paradise. Better than all Flyfish, at least.

 

[2Ws2Ls]

x-rank matchmaking is insane. First off, what are these categories? why is bow in the same category as hydra but NO chargers? some of the categories seem to have many different positions in them. the regions is mostly a bandaid solution but i understand because nintendo cant address it directly. but the 2k x-power matchmaking barrier is a sin. this this common piece of copium for players trying to get better at games where they cant get to higher ranks because all players are either too low ranked to get significant gains or too high ranked to reasonbly beat. there are a few reasons as to why this is raw cope, but nintendo made it an actual thing? for some reason? playing around 2k x-power is just. not possible.

 

[Cephalobro]

Oh and it seems like that compared to Splatoon 2, is way too easy to get splatted by Salmonids. I can still clearly remember just barely not getting splatted, but now it seems like barely not getting splatted was a problem for Nintendo apparently, so they had to tweak some damage outputs just to make sure that barely surviving isn't common anymore.

Okay, here's the thing I absolutely hated about Splatoon 3: Constant FOMO stuff. Like seriously, on top of Splatfests, they added Big Run (which actually has a good thing about it now that scales are doubled), Eggstra Work (which is simply redundant if you ask me), and Challenges (a neat concept on paper, but not that great in execution). "Oh and here's a catalog you must complete in three months to get exclusive stuff easily, enjoy!"

Yeah as you can see, I really hated the constant FOMO stuff that Splatoon 3 had done, I just feel like it was a cheap way to keep players playing the game, which for the most part, still didn't work as the number of active players still went down a whole lot thanks to other games releasing after Splatoon 3.

 

[Catloafman]

Squid roll armor
This feels like it should be WAY cooler parrying attacks in any game is just flat out cool especially if the attack was going to kill you if you didn't parry it
but like IT DOESN'T WORK
it occasionally works against bombs but not against chargers blasters rollers Trizooka inkvac reefslider Kraken ultra stamp like what gives???
I am ok with specials piercing through squid roll armor (just not spawn armor WHY nintendo) but MAINS?!?!?!?
Also lag is really annoying with it because you can hear the parry sound but you still die

 

[Forma]

...I am ok with specials piercing through squid roll armor (just not spawn armor WHY nintendo)

I didn't know this was a thing until last night.

I'm beyond annoyed that it is.

 

[briank913]

I believe the philosophy behind the game design is that it assumes you'll only be playing that. If you don't believe me, look at the reward system. The gold scale drop rate being asinine, as well as Gears costing 30 Golds and banners costing 333 Gold Scales? You can do the former but it'll take a long time. And the latter? The people I played with who have it told me it took them about 6-8 months. If you don't have a job it's one thing...but not all of us do.

The game also feels like it punishes more than reward. Oh a DC happened when you won and the game registered that you won? Ban hammer plus minus rank. Oh a first minute DC? We'll punish the DC-er but everyone else gets...nothing! No minor bonus, no reward

But the worst thing has to be how PvP works: having someone be the host rather than having a dedicated server?

In the long run, you can only enjoy this game if you play with friends/a team. SoloQ-ing for a long time can't maximize the fun you'll have imo.

 

[OnePotWonder]

I didn't touch on armor because I have way too many things to say about it.

Squid armor works identically to Ink Armor from Splatoon 2, the worst special ability to ever be conceived by god or man in the history of video games on Earth. Excellent start.
Ink Armor has 30 HP and will nullify up to 100 damage from a single shot, with carryover carrying over. Once broken, the armor gives a player a few frames of invulnerability. This makes it a complete pain for one-shot weapons to deal with, and still decently strong against rapid-firing weapons. The main problem with Ink Armor was instant team chaining. Squid armor has other problems.

The window for actually parrying damage with a squid roll or surge is incredibly narrow. Anything that does 200 or more damage will splat an enemy through the armor, and anything that does over 100 damage will still have damage carryover. Successfully parrying a lethal bomb leaves a player on 20 HP, not worth it whatsoever save for a few scenarios where you urgently need space and nobody is shooting at you.

One-shot blasters do a consistent 125 damage on a direct hit, which means successfully parrying a blaster shot leaves a player on 75 HP; more than any blaster is capable of dealing with an indirect. If squid armor actually worked against blasters, it would be a huge pain. Because it doesn't work, it's a huge pain.
Why even bother letting squid rolls and surges parry attacks if they can't even do it properly?

And spawn armor, it truly disgusts me. Tri-Zooka, Ink Vac, Reefslider, and thrown Ultra Stamps can pierce it, for some reason. It can be easily shredded by Crab Tank, Zipcaster, Kraken Royale, Triple Splashdown, and Ultra Stamp's rush mode.
It doesn't block chargers properly. It barely does anything against rapid fire weapons because players are vulnerable while they're still launching out of the goddamn drone.

Nintendo has no excuses. It would be so easy to make spawn armor completely unbreakable, and that alone would fix almost all of the issues with spawn camping. They did not need to make squid armor only last for ten frames. They did not need to need to add even a single one-way route into the enemy spawn, and they did not need to make the only completely safe space on half of the maps have the square footage of an average apartment in Japan. If you're going to do that, at least have a spawn barrier for that area, you single-celled imbeciles.

Simply put, the design for armor in this game is a complete travesty.

 

[Tinybitt]

Damn. I wish I could have been there, sounds like paradise. Better than all Flyfish, at least.

I knew I’d get a reaction out of you lmao

Okay, here's the thing I absolutely hated about Splatoon 3: Constant FOMO stuff. Like seriously, on top of Splatfests, they added Big Run (which actually has a good thing about it now that scales are doubled), Eggstra Work (which is simply redundant if you ask me), and Challenges (a neat concept on paper, but not that great in execution). "Oh and here's a catalog you must complete in three months to get exclusive stuff easily, enjoy!"

Yeah, I can see how that stuff can get annoying. I personally feel like challenges are the most obvious and best addition that happened in splat 3. Not for any competitive or trying to get to high ranks stuff but rather for the stupid fun it gives. Like, all hammers or crazy fast rollers are a freaking fever dream and it’s the most fun I’ve had in a while.

The only one I have a problem with is Eggstra Work. It’s basically “Overfishers: The game” which I don’t mind, there are people that like to have fun in that way, but only one eggstra work per season!? It’s just a slightly longer Salmon run shift. Maybe it could have the same frequency as challenges. Plus it will give people without SR teams a chance since not a lot of overfishers would be playing and jacking up the score

In the long run, you can only enjoy this game if you play with friends/a team. SoloQ-ing for a long time can't maximize the fun you'll have imo.

I think that’s the conclusion I’m arriving at too, right now. I got to S and just could not play anymore due to matchmaking putting me in dumb team comps or being wiped out immediately by the opponents team. I went 0-3 on both series and decided that my sanity is more valuable to me (Just in case putting this addendum: I was not the worst on my team. There was one game where I did struggle, but still.

I feel like with team stuff, you’re actually playing against more or less balanced people. Plus, you can come up with your own comps. But most importantly, you know that your teammates are human and your enemies are human. Not bots or little jimmy from 1st grade or people who don’t pay attention to anything.

 

[Yosi Spring]

Successfully parrying a lethal bomb leaves a player on 20 HP, not worth it whatsoever in any scenario.

I agree with everything you said about armor except for this one part. Squid rolling through bombs has actually saved me a lot of times. Especially when you're carrying the rainmaker and you don't always have enough time to swim away from the bomb. It's also nice for lingering suction bombs, if you don't want to wait for them to explode before moving forward, or for rushing down players who roll splat bombs on the ground.

 

[OnePotWonder]

I agree with everything you said about armor except for this one part. Squid rolling through bombs has actually saved me a lot of times. Especially when you're carrying the rainmaker and you don't always have enough time to swim away from the bomb. It's also nice for lingering suction bombs, if you don't want to wait for them to explode before moving forward, or for rushing down players who roll splat bombs on the ground.

Fair enough. There are a few select cases where parrying a bomb is worth it to make urgent progress forward. Still, it’d be better if bombs did less carryover damage. There’s really no reason for them to overkill as much as they do.

 

[Yosi Spring]

Fair enough. There are a few select cases where parrying a bomb is worth it to make urgent progress forward. Still, it’d be better if bombs did less carryover damage. There’s really no reason for them to overkill as much as they do.

Oh yeah, 100%. I think it would be great if the armor was specifically good against subs/specials and not main weapons. Would fix the inconsistencies with rollers/blasters/chargers, and make rolling through bombs proper counterplay.

 

[NumberOneAries]

Splatoon 3 is a good game littered with god awful design.

The lowest offence on the scale is the amount of grinding required to obtain badges. This is fair because they're badges, the whole point of having them is to flex your achievements. But, really? 9 999 999 Grizzco points for the golden point badge?

Next is matchmaking. It works most of the time, but then you get a game with two Tri-Stringers and an E-liter, and the other team has three shooters and a Tri-Slosher. By the way, you're playing a splatling.

Speaking of shooters, the game completely fails to make harder weapons stronger than easier ones. No matter what, there will always be a shooter in top tier. Nintendo sees to it intentionally. I don't get it, why should the basic vanilla Splattershot be at the same level as Snipewriter and Splatana Stamper? They should nerf good shooters into high or mid tier and let dualies or brellas take their place.
At the very least, have the top tier shooters be the semi-automatics. Instead of them being, you know, bottom tier.

Tableturf Battle cannot be played online. The mode is therefore completely dead.

For whatever reason, Flyfish are still in the game.

Nintendo refuses to balance sub weapons despite the fact that half of them are utterly outclassed. They keep putting Squid Beakons on short-range weapons that cannot do anything without bombs. Meanwhile Heavy Edit, a perfect Beakon option, gets Splat Bomb.

Side Order takes about five hours to 100% complete and the only real difficulty comes from playing with no hacks enabled, which is just generally not fun.

It takes a century to gather enough king scales for so much as one of the three golden Grizzco banners. Also, the quality of the scales is completely independent from whether or not you actually defeat the king salmonid.

.52 Gal is good despite having two specials that do barely anything for it. .52 Gal is the most complained about weapon in the game. Sloshing Machine was given a 5 frame slosh rate nerf when it was good. Why has .52 Gal received zero nerfs?

The maps go out of their way to add the most garbage, useless routes into each team's base just so enemies can push in farther and spawn camp more easily. The grates on Scorch Gorge. The uninkable floor on Eeltail. That one grate on Mincemeat. That one block on Barnacle and Dime. These routes would be better if they didn't exist, so why do they?

And the thing I hate most about the game, touching enemy ink for a single frame will cause you to get trapped unless you run any Ink Resistance Up. Enemy ink is the bane of my existence. Forget fixing Ink Resistance Up by having one sub be default, one main should be default. Enemy ink should not affect the player unless they sit in it for at least half a second, and all weapons should ink their users' feet every single shot.

The premise of Splatoon 3 and the general gameplay is something that's irreplicably good. I just wish they could fix a few things about the game.

You literally said everything I would've said ESPECIALLY with the speck of ink trapping you. It's my biggest pet peeve in the game.

 

[youre_a_squib_now]

I personally think the scale prizes for SR are completely reasonable. People ask "how are you supposed to get all of this?" You're not.

As Gem talks about in this video (not about salmon run) Splatoon just expects you to spend a lot of time playing it. Salmon run is no different. The goal is that no matter how much you play, there's always a reward to work towards. And I do mean no matter how much you play; that's why the gold grizzco badge takes so absurdly long. Even if someone, for some reason, played SR enough to get every single reward in the shop, there would still be the gold badge to go for. And personally, if I put in the effort to get 333 gold scales, I'd rather have multiple banner options to choose from.

tldr: you're not supposed to "100%" Splatoon. Why would they add fewer rewards if it means players would run out of things to do?